Monday, November 18, 2013

The Greatest Musical Movies

Well, here is the list that I have been waiting to write ever since I started writing about movies. Ok maybe that is not true, I think tomorrows list wins that title. However today’s list was the easiest one for me to write. It is a top ten, and it is my top ten.  So say what you will about it, in the end it is mine. If you don’t like it, go make your own.  I will tell you that I had a little bit of criteria as for what I consider a musical.  The main thing is that the music had to just happen, people in real life don’t just start singing for no reason and the whole world accepts it. Also, there are no full cartoons on this list, for two reasons; one, I don’t watch too many cartoons, and two, the idea of the singing as accepted behavior blurs the line when a mermaid, crab and fish are all singing together. The other thing to note is that a majority of these were at one time or another stage productions, I am only talking about the movies, and yes in some of the movies they completely changed things.  So without any more explanation, here it is.

10. Hair
So, Hair is a good place to start as any.  So if you have never seen or heard of Hair, it’s about the late 60’s. It covers issues around hippie culture, drug use, promiscuous sexuality, draft dodging, the Vietnam wars, and protests around it. I won’t be the first to tell you this, but the movie is not as good as the stage show(nude scene aside) The movie tells a good story, and a story that people did not really want told at the time it was originally written. By people I mean the straight forward thinking media and politicians. The dancing in the movie is good, The singing is also pretty killer. Probably the biggest surprise is that Nell Carter is in the movie. Maybe that means nothing to you, but the first time I saw it and saw her I was excited.  I will tell you this as well, I have watched the movie stone sober and in an altered state of mind. Thinking that the movie would be “cooler” in the latter state. Well, actually it isn’t and at least for me, you sort of lose the political stance. So that being said, if you watch this movie, do it straight up, besides you will eat less popcorn too.



9. Mary Poppins
Ok, first things first, and I promise that I will try to make this the last drug reference in this post, but since you just read about hair, and I gave an opinion on that, I will say this; this movie is incredible and completely hilarious for all the wrong reasons if you are high.  In fact, since we are on the subject of that, I will say that there is a whole culture of conspiracies around all Disney movies and Mary Poppins is one of the biggest ones. But enough of that, you can look that up on your own time.  So Mary Poppins, if you have never seen it, is a really good movie, a nanny comes from the skies and takes children on an adventure. In the end the children’s unapproving father learns a lesson or two and becomes a much better man. Of course everyone knows of supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. (Ok, side-note no squiggly red line so either somehow I know how to spell that, or my spellcheck broke, and either way that freaks me out.)  My favorite scene in the movie is the I Love to Laugh scene which stars Ed Wynn; a great old time character actor, who also did the voice of The Mad Hatter in the cartoon of Alice In Wonderland.  The whole movie is good; there are a few cartoon moments. I have memorized so much of the film,  and if you are interested I can give you a free showing later, for now enjoy my favorite scene.




8. The Muppets
Ok so this is the only film on this list produced after 1979, so that says a lot for it.  Some people say that we are entering an era to revive musicals, and I really wish that that were true. But today’s generation won’t want to sit longer than an hour and a half at a movie, so I don’t think that it is possible. I will admit, I am still trying to decide whether or not Muppets are real. Either way, the movie is really good and the actors and actresses in it all do their parts well. Jason Segal is great, plus not a bad singer. Also, Segal helped write the movie. The movie revives the whole Muppet franchise and adds a new Muppet to the mix. I wish Disney didn’t own the Muppets, but they own everything now. (Don’t even mention Star Wars, cause I will hit you dammit) So the plot makes sense and adds to the lore of the Muppets and it adds on to some of the original stories.  Also, the 4th wall is broken often which adds depth as well, in my opinion. There are a lot of great cameos, including Mickey Rooney (It was reaaly crazy for me, because I could have sworn he was dead. And I don’t know why he isn’t) So, yes definitely watch this one, it is one of those movies that has value for the whole family and jokes that kids don’t get.


7. Paint Your Wagon
Ok, this is the one on the list that few people have probably heard of, but it is a great old musical. Set in the old west during the gold rush, and it stars Lee Marvin and Clint Eastwood. Wait for it…..has it settled in yet?   Yep that’s right God Damn Lee Marvin who plays Liberty Valance, or better yet Major Reisman in The Dirty Dozen and that’s not all Clint Eastwood, Dirty Fucking Harry, or Gunny Highway.  This movie was made in 1969 when musicals were becoming a lost art and somehow Paramount Pictures got two of the meanest toughest sons of bitches to star. Better yet, neither of them are horrible singers, Marvin’s songs were huge in Great Britain and Australia.  The movie is really funny and although not really historically accurate does make a good period piece. Oh, also, The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band is in the movie.  It is a very long movie and has a few extra plot parts not needed. But if you want to see a treat by some great actors, go for it. Plus you will find yourself wondering as to whether or not there is anything that Clint Eastwood can’t do.



6. The Wizard of Oz
Ok, wait a minute before you say that this is a much better movie than to be rated number six. I agree that it is a great movie and if I had to make a list of the greatest movies of all time I would surely include it. But this is a list of my preferences; also, this movie was such an important part of my childhood.  I have probably seen this movie the most of any movie on this list, or really any movie period. So what sort of has happened is that I forget that it is a musical. Honestly, I think someone out there has to agree with me, I know all the songs and love it so much, and I have watched it in slow motion at the parts where you can see the goof ups and the hanging and all that stuff. I have even done the whole Dark Side of the Moon thing.  So I really do love the movie, and again honestly, I forget that it is a musical, and maybe that is a good thing and a testament to how great it is. The movie is such an important piece of history.  I am not really saying much about the plot or anything because I assume that everyone in the world knows about The Wizard of Oz, and if you don’t know about it, you should make it your top priority.




5. The Sound of Music
This is another classic movie and it is Julie Andrews second foray onto my list. The Story is of the Trapp Family Singers, and if you didn’t know this already, the story is true somewhat, of course the movie does make quite a few changes,  but the fact that it is mainly true is pretty cool as shit.  The movie depicts  the late 30’s in Europe, whereby a young woman training to be a nun is sent to care for a family of children and inevitably falls in love with them and their father. The father though has decided against joining the Nazi party and the family has to flee through the mountains. Ok literally that is all the major plot points so I hope I didn’t ruin it, obviously a lot of other things happen. The music in the movie is very memorable and has been parodied many times especially Do, Re, Mi. All in all it is a great movie that every family should at least watch once together. If you get nostalgic and want to be a part of the history, The family runs a lodge in Vermont that you can stay at, go skiing and all the such.



4. The Music Man
Again, this is my list so don’t argue with me. This is a great damn film.  It’s about a traveling sales man who really is a con man who stops in River City Iowa and gets caught up in love and eventually gets caught by the town as trying to swindle them, but it turns out he somehow was able to start a boys band without ever teaching the kids how to play their instruments. And that is the movie in a nut shell. However I am not sure how he actually makes money since he gets the kids instruments and uniforms. But I digress, the first thing you should know is that there is no River City, Iowa; which I sadly found out on a trip to Iowa. But the cast of the movie is so impressive, I mean come on, it has Buddy Hackett in it. Plus Marian is played by Shirley Jones, The mom from the Partridge family. Robert Preston is the main star, he was in a few other cool musicals and The Last Starfighter, where he kind of reprised his role.  Also, how could I forget young Ronnie Howard; Richie Freaking Cunningham from Happy Days, also currently the director of a lot of good movies, that he always puts his ugly brother in, he plays a liitle boy named Winthrop. Oh man also The Buffalo Bills, an incredible barbershop quartet make an incredible appearance and sing some great songs. The music is incredible and has been covered by long lists of people including The Beatles and most recently Seth McFarlane, so hey if you want to see some good stuff. Check it out!



3. Grease
Ok, so who doesn’t know Grease; an incredible movie that only misses a few parts of the original musical. A coming of age sort of film that was made in the seventies about the fifties, and how about that cast, John Travolta, Jeff Conway, Didi Conn, Olivia Newton- John, Stockard Channing, Sha Na Na, Frankie Avalon, I mean come on, the cast is incredible, then add the dancing and the songs, and you got the stuff my adolescent Saturday mornings were made of.  Everyone in America has to have heard at least one song from the movie. Every shitty wedding DJ plays the Grease megamix, or at least Greased Lightning.  By the way I really did mean that I think of the film as a coming of age story, and it is that way for a lot of the characters, Danny becomes a nice guy, Sandy finds her dark side. Kenickie and Rizzo lighten up a little, Frenchie goes through a million changes. Plus the big thing in the movie is sex, I mean really, everyone assumes musicals are safe for their children, and Grease seems so wholesome, but come on it is all sex. I don’t want to try to point it all out, but Olivia Newton-John starts it off quick with “got my suit damp”  and for some odd reason they wrap their Greased Lightning in plastic like a condom, plus all the innuendos in that song.  But hey I am not complaining, why do you think I liked it so much?




2. Jesus Christ Superstar
Anyone that knows me personally or knows about my feelings on religion would find it crazy that this movie is even on the list, but hell, it is a great movie. I mean, how could a movie about the most popular person in the history of the world not be good.  Mel Gibson liked the storyline of Jesus Christ Superstar so much that he copied it for a movie of his own, but he left out all the good musical numbers, totally ruining it. (before I get hate mail, it is totally a joke and I don’t mean to offend anyone’s belief, it’s just a stab at Mel Gibson, and if that offends you, then you are as crazy as he is these days.)So the movie is based on the original musical, so both of them are accused of blasphemy but they actually made some changes to the film to offend less people. The whole thing is derived from the Christian period of The Passion, which is basically the ending of Jesus’ life.  The movie really has no notable stars to talk about, but the music is incredible. The way the film is presented is pretty damn cool. Some kids go out in the desert and recreate the last days of Christ. So really it gets weird at some points, guns and all the other new things mixed in, but that is how it is supposed to be kind of.  Keep in Mind Andrew Lloyd Webber made it as an album and claims that the 2000 movie version best recreates the vision that he had. So this one made in 1973 was apparently a little off, but to me it’s the best version of it that I have seen so far. Supposedly there is a remake coming, who knows, but until then. This is it.




1. The Rocky Horror Picture Show
You had to know it was coming. You just had to. So I refuse to give you any sort of synopsis, because you seriously have to just experience the film in its entire splendor. Instead just a bit of info about the movie. Ok, where do I begin, how about the fact that you can go see this movie in Theatres. Hell you can go see it in Milwaukee still. This is just an incredible film and story; I was introduced to it as a young pre-teen, when I slept over at my cousin’s house. Since then, I just continue to fall in love with it more and more. If you have seen it and didn’t get it, then that’s your deal. It makes perfect sense to me. It is camp, it is horror, it is comedy, it is gore, it is everything that it needs to be. It was written and put on in London first by Richard O’Brien, a man who was in Hair and Jesus Christ Superstar. O’Brien’s genius move was that he then wrote the screenplay and stars as Riff-Raff in the movie, so any liberty taken from the stage production was done by the man who wrote it himself. How much better than that can you get. .  I mean this was a relatively unknown cast, and a lot of them went on to bigger things.  Tim Curry as Frank is one of the greatest movie roles of all time.  I tell you what, if there is any production that I wish I could be in that would be the one. I have spent years perfecting my copy of Curry’s voice. So if anyone ever needs me I am available for the role.


Ok there it is My top ten musicals of all time. I wish I could show you the whole list of movies that were in contention but I have an idea for that. So I hope you enjoyed it, and I know you might disagree but just check it out tell me what you think let me know what I left off!

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